Reap Where You Sow

by Byron Coley, Therapist Intern

We often hear the biblical phrase “you reap what you sow” (Galatians 6:7, KJV), which simply means a person will receive that which they plant.  According to this philosophy, if a person treats their spouse or partner badly, they will in turn be treated in a similar manner.  Inversely, if an individual treats their spouse in a loving way, it is likely that their love will be returned.

Along with reaping what you sow, individuals must also understand that they reap where they sow.  This phrase suggests that seeds will grow where they are planted.  If a person plants grass seeds in their front yard, they cannot expect those same seeds to grow in the back yard.  As relationships are concerned: If an individual puts a lot of time and effort into their job, it is probable that they will reap the results of that hard work.  This may yield promotions, higher pay, or just an overall sense of success.  However, the time and hard work individuals place in their jobs cannot be use as a substitute for the love and attention they show their partners.

Not only can this idea be used for a person’s employment, it can be tied to a variety of things such as: children, friends, family, hobbies, etc.  All of these are important, and thus are worthy of an individual’s time and attention, but must be done in moderation.  If a person is practicing his or her golf game, and is spending less time with their spouse/family, this could obviously pose a problem within the couple-relationship.  Of course it is great to have an improved putting game, but at what cost?

It is great and sometimes necessary to have a variety of hobbies and people that you can spend time with.  Yet, it is important to have balance, and set intimate time aside for your partner and children.  Remember to sow good seeds, which will ideally be restored back to you, and most importantly be conscious of which areas of your life you are planting those seeds.